I love this man. And I've had this song stuck in my head for about a week because of this video. If I ever stop listening to non-stop a-ha, I'm going to look up more Vicious Pink.


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I have a list of songs I fall asleep to, followed by a repeating mp3 of ocean waves that works great as white noise. Last night, I actually went to bed before dawn - no way! - but I kept waking up and falling asleep.

Several times, I found myself having woken up without really realizing it, and I was just listening to my music. And it sounded so weird. I thought it was because I was half-asleep, maybe; but it sounded like part of the track was missing, or like the vocals were unusually clear. I kept rolling over and pulling my little ipod speaker closer to try to determine what sounded different. And then I'd think, "what the fuck am I doing, I need to be sleeping" and would stop.

But today, stuff still sounds strange! It's really bugging me, because these are songs I've listened to an insane number of times. Some of them I've probably listened to once a day for the last five years. And I can't even put my finger on what sounds different, exactly.

I'm way too bothered by little things, aren't I!

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I've been trying to find another job -- I really, really want to go to Europe -- but so far, no luck. Had two interviews after which I didn't get hired -- one was at a company I used to work for, doing a job I used to do! -- and another that called me for an interview but it was for an emergency position. Something with no guaranteed hours and no guaranteed shifts isn't going to work for me; as much as I hate waitressing, it is my full time job and it's not like I could just tell them to fuck off because this other place suddenly needed me on a Friday night.


And then I've gotten rejection letters on seven other jobs. I know it's a rough job market, so I'm trying not to get discouraged. I did feel really sorry for myself after the place I used to work for turned me down though, and then I got pissed. It was a call center, and when I worked there before I always got perfect scores on my random quality assurance tests. There was no reason for them not to hire me other than I think the female interviewer didn't like me. The guy seemed to.

I'll keep looking, though; I think I'm going to end up with a second restaurant job, though, at this point. Which I guess is okay. It's only for a few months anyway until I run off to chase you-know-who around Europe for a while!


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(A sponsored post.)


I love my sofa. It's purple, which of course was a major factor in purchasing it. It's also textured fabric which I thought wouldn't hold on to cat hair so much. HA! I haven't scraped the hair off it in two days so right now it looks gray because the hair sticks to it like no other. Sometimes I wish I'd gotten the faux-leather reclining sofa I looked at instead just because of that.

Of course, it's probably a good thing I didn't because in the last six years my cats have managed to claw the arms of my couch down through the foam to the wood. Not while I'm here of course--they're smart enough to do it while I'm gone! Bastard kitties.

Eventually I'm going to have to get a new couch; although I think I'll get a slipcover for this one for the foreseeable future. I'm broke, after all -- and assuming I do come up with money, I'll be blowing it on a trip to Europe! Eventually, though, I would like to have a nice reclining sofa with maybe a matching love seat or chair -- you know, grown-up furniture instead of the random collection of stuff I've currently cobbled together.

And a house to put it in. That might be important.

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This month has been an utter clusterfuck. I had to pay my rent late--like way late. And then my checking account was overdrawn because of it, so I had to pay fees on that. After my Sunday shift, I finally had enough to cover that and one other thing that was coming out yesterday.

Or so I thought.

My fucking bank apparently decided to push through two more things that were pending in the early afternoon--so now I'm $130 in the hole AGAIN. So now I have to make $130 to cover that, $110 for my phone bill, $682 for rent, and whatever else to keep myself and my animals fed and put gas in my car. It's not going to fucking happen.

It's only $60 but coming on the heels of everything else, it's a major fucking setback. I've paid $250 in late/overdraft fees this month because of shit like this. I'm working as hard as I can and I can't catch up. I'm so tired of this. I just want to give up. If I didn't have animals to take care of, I might just curl up in my bed and not get out ever again. Just lie there and sleep until someone physically removes me.

Yeah, I'm being melodramatic. But I've been crying so hard I can hardly breathe for half an hour, and I thought if I focused on writing it out it might help. It's not.

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And the cranky neighbors will be gone! Found out yesterday that they're moving. As are the people in half of the other building. I kind of hope that the management company can't find anyone to rent the one next to me, at least ... not having neighbors is so much more convenient! I'm not entirely surprised they're leaving--they've had electrical problems the entire time, and apparently mice too. Add me and my annoying music/dogs and ... well ... I WIN! HAHAHA!

Now, if I can just make the rest of June's rent money this weekend, I'll hopefully just barely be able to make July's rent by the 1st, and hopefully this unit won't be vacant too!

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