My plan was to come home from work and studying through the night. Then I'd go take my exam, go to my doctor's appointment, and then come home and crash for as long as possible before going back to work.

What actually happened: work was awful, completely draining. I came home with my head throbbing, my blood pressure probably sky-high, feeling sort of lightheaded and generally exhausted. I also had been having lovely stabbing pains up the side of my neck that made me feel like gagging, and also resulted in me dropping a bunch of plates at work..

So when I got home, I dug out my heating pad, set an alarm for the middle of the night, and gave myself some time to relax. Unfortunately, my neck pain spread down into my shoulder while using the heating pad--I have no idea how or why. It was so bad I gave up and took three more Advil and went to bed, because lying completely still was the only way to minimize the pain--any movement, including breathing, hurt. I knew I needed to study, but sitting up and turning pages was .... ouch.

I've been awake for nearly an hour; not that I really got any sleep anyway, since every time I'd roll over in my sleep the pain would wake me up. Since waking up I've been staring at my study guide blankly, feeling ridiculously overwhelmed. I'm basically screwed, I think.

Then again, whether I get 40% or 100% on this exam, it won't change my letter grade. I guess I shouldn't worry. The exam is in 25 minutes, it's not like I can do anything anyway at this point. It's my own fault I'm in this situation with my overall grade anyway, I just have to suck it up already.

I just hope the nice doctor can give me a muscle relaxer or something, because this pain when I breathe? So not boding well for a busy Friday night at work. Or the two days of double shifts after it.

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2 Responses
  1. Simon Says:

    I can't believe you're working as hard as you do AND you're studying... amazing. I know lots of people do it all the time, but I've been lucky enough never to have had to do it. I hold people like you, with the work ethic you have, in awe, even though I know this is a necessity. I'd probably just end up marrying some rich old dude and offing him in his sleep...

  2. purplegirl Says:

    Well now you're making me feel bad. I don't have a good work ethic, I have a spent-myself-into-serious-debt-how-the-fuck-do-i-pay-my-electric-bill-this-month ethic, combined with a fifty-grand-in-student-loans-and-no-degree-to-show-for-it-guess-i-better-fix-that-huh ethic.

    Given a choice, I'd happily sit around my house living a pants-free existence. :)